The Long road of recovery

There are some things in life thath just take time.Grief after the loss of a loved one,developing a relationship, investing in a career,are some examples.Recovery from an episode of mental illnessis not the exception.When one experiences an episode(meaning here a period of tme that is defined by instability)all the cards of your life fall down.Emotionally you are bankrupt,physically you are spent and spiritually you are left to wonder the wisdom and compassion of a so called loving god.When I experienced my most recent episode all of the above applied.I felt terrible and looked worse!So when I was discharged from the hospitalI wanted recovery to happen as soon and as fast as possible.I didn't acknowledge that much like a broken bone my brain needed time to heal.Last week I experienced my first week without a medication change.Like fine tuning an engine ,doctors fiddle with meds in order to achieve the best outcomes.But I have been impatient for consistancy.Recovery is still not going fast enough for me. Physically ,its getting better, The meds are working,and I'm no longer as lethargic as I was both pre and post episode.Emotionally I'm still fragile.I guess I still kinda can't believethis has all happened to me.Then  I snap out of it and try to refocus on recovery. One thing Ive learned is that recovey is a long hard road,but it's legitimate to want things to be O.K. again. My desire to be well fuels a more solid recovery I just need to remind myself to give it time.If time heals all wounds then I guess I have found a new ally!