Bipolar strategies...

My first depressive episode happened when I was fifteen. My family had just moved to California and I was feeling out of place. I was an East Coast girl trying to fit into Southern California high school. Tough! I had difficulty adjusting and consequently started to isolate. I spent long hours reading and essentially hibernating in my room. I don't know if this was a reaction to the move or the start of my mental illness . I think a little of both. Perhaps the stress of life events triggered my first bout. Whatever it was, the episodes became more frequent and more severe.

The only thing that saved me during that time was golf. It consumed me. I started to get out of my room and onto the sunlight golf courses. I practiced despite the depression and found some peace on the links. I loved the strategy involved in navigating a golf course and looking back it was a distraction from what was going on inside my head. Off the course I was given to dark moods. On the course  I felt lighter. The sun, the sky, the green fairways all helped me escape the experience of depression. It just lost some of it's power when I was hitting a ball!

Golf taught me a lot of valuable lessons during this period of time,one being how to get out of trouble. It has served me well in my fight mental illness. On the golf course you are going to eventually hit the ball into trouble. It's almost inevitable. Just like in my life I found myself in some difficult places. The trick was not to get upset, figure a way to get out and avoid doing it again. The same goes for depression. I just refuse to believe that you have to be stuck in an episode. I know the feeling of being overwhelmed and trapped into feeling hopeless, but I have to believe that you can fight your way out of it.

Fighting your way out of it is not a popular strategy. Many in the mental health community would say that it is unrealistic to expect that of someone who is ill. I know how it feels to be severely depressed and more often then not medication was the primary response. I couldn't fight because I was not able not unwilling. Once medicated however, I believe I had a responsibility to manage my mental illness,and I could do it by having a plan of attack .

My first move is to enlist the help of a psychiatrist. You simply have to believe that what you are experiencing is an illness and you are in need medical help. Bipolar disorder is a medical illness.You need a professional on your team. In golf you need a specialist as well .A teaching pro serves a s a second pair of eyeballs. He can tell you what you are doing right and correct what you are doing wrong. Same with a psychiatrist. He can diagnose you properly and prescribe the right medication to alleviate your symptoms.

I see a psychologist. Talking to someone about your emotions is key. From sharing what is going right and what is going wrong you can gain the perspective of another. Allying yourself with a competent therapist boosts your chances of success in your battle. Gaining the perspective of another will help you avoid pitfalls in the future.Talking about how you are managing your illness may also reveal what you are doing right so you can incorporate the behavior in your struggle. Look at your therapist as a teammate. They are there to help you chart a course. My teammates in golf often pointed out details of the golf course I didn't or couldn't see. Taking their advice helped me avoid danger and saved me strokes. Your trusted therapist can help you see the obstacles in your life and save you time and energy.

Enlist the help of others! Don't isolate! You will often need help an it is ok to want to share your struggles with others. I learned a lot from my fellow golf competitors. I observed their approach to the game and tried to incorporate their strengths into my game. I now have many friends and family members who are stronger and wiser than I . I am not beneath enlisting their help and assistance. A support group will also help you in the same way.You can hear and see first hand what otheres who share your struggle are doing right. You can gain the experience and insight of others who have truly walked in your shoes!

Finally, know your enemy! A round of golf is built on strategy. After you figure out how a course is designed you can navigate it wisely and avoid trouble. A life managing a chronic illness also demands a strategy. Know where your trouble lies.! For example, if you are prone to depression during the winter months, repeat steps 1 and 2 over and over again ! Have a list of goals and  a to do list that will keep you on track and motivated. If your simplest accomplishment when in episode is to take a shower , write that down and check it off daily. You have achieved something!

Don't take episodes lying down in your battle against mental illness.Have the pluck to fight! Go into the  struggle with a sustainable strategy.