High flying.

"High flying" is another expession for bipolar mania. When manic, the world speeds up. You talk more ,spend more, emote more. Basically you are more. More, more , more. To some, you will be too much and eventually you will become too much for even yourself.



Mania is intoxicating and it is no wonder that some bipolars become addicted to the high. You feel on top of the world. Words and ideas flow. The world around you seems ripe for the picking. Thoughts are rapid and everything you can think of is attainable. The downside is mania can spiral into psychosis. For me, this is a short trip. My thoughts and actions go out of control. In the last episode I quit my job thinking I had more "important" work to do, yet I couldn't tell you what that work entailed. It's a exhilirating feeling to manic but the ultimate consequence is disaster in both decision making, daily living and life choices.



During this season, (fall and winter) I have to be especially vigilant about my mental illness. If I am going to go manic it is during this season. I love the holidays but have to be careful that I don't love them too much! The hustle and bustle , the spending, the celebrations, all combine to key me up.



 Although I have spent the holidays manic and sometimes in a hospital for manic psychosis, I look forward to the holidays this year. I am in a good place.I am happy but not too happy. My moods are stable, not too high and not too low. It's a desirable state of being and I am looking forward to spending the season this way. Stability is the goal. Thank God I am finally attaining it!